A fork of Rural Dictionary
Being so fat that you have to identify as 2 people
I was denied access to the fun fair ride due to my physical schizophrenia
While your lady is casually dropping a loaf, walk in and place the tip of your member up against her forehead whilst shouting “unicorn”. She will love this…results may vary
Bill: did you hear about Geoff? He gave his wife a unicorn…his wake is on Tuesday”
When you drop a sizable dump into the toilet creating a splash back with sufficient height to be able to reach the anus. The Poseidon’s Tongue is the one drop of splashback that licks inside the anus
Dave: wow, I dropped a hefer of a dump and ended up with a Poseidon’s Tongue
Keith: that’s horrendous, you poor bastard
When your partners member has too much length / girth to be taken in orally by the usual methods. The typewriter is the alternative approach of approaching the schlong from the side and going to town “corn on the cob style”
Oh Susan…it was just so big I had no choice but to pull out the typewriter
When, during a sunbed tanning session, one forgets to cover ones member with either suntan cream or a towel. The result being a sunburned, unusable Polony Pony.
Did you hear about Ted? He can't bang that hooker he ordered online because of his grilled banana.