Country Dictionary

A fork of Rural Dictionary

Jerk off and smoke Newports

A figurative description of an attitude towards life, as well as your immediate and distant surroundings. When you refer to yourself or someone else 'just Jerking off and smoking Newports',, you are simply trying to convey that you/they are not letting anything current issue take their mind off themselves. It is the most self-absorbed and least constructive activity imaginable.

Once I get my pension, I am just gonna retreat to my apartment in Des Moines, and then I'm just gonna jerk off and smoke Newports until Yellowstone does us all in, THAT's my 5-year plan!

I tried to pursuade him to get more involved in student politics, but he just sits in his room jerking off and smoking Newports like these things don't affect him!

by how-young-people-talk March 31, 2020

national jerk your boyfriend off day

National jerk your boyfriend off day: the day to masturbate your male partner

its National jerk your boyfriend off day which means I need to drive over to my boyfriend and use my hands to stroke his dick!

by j_1234567810 June 10, 2024

Jerking-Off Pumped

When something is so exciting, so completely enthralling that you are nearly dying of the anticipation. In fact, the excitement is so great that it is equivalent to the feeling of jerking off. As such, you are completely pumped by the idea of doing something on par with masturbating.

Bill-"Wait, we're killing a 30 case right after the concert featuring our favorite band of all time!?"

Frank-"Hell yeah man get excited!"

Bill-"That's gonna be the best day ever! I'm Jerking-Off Pumped about the whole situation!"

Frank-"You read my mind!"

by mythicaldancer March 22, 2011

Jerked off

When someone is visibly angry or irritated but not to the extent of being pissed off.

“Hey, did you see how mad bill was this morning?” “Yeah he’s all jerked off

by BDizzy January 29, 2024

National Jerk Off Day

On October 14th, this national holiday will be a free day to please yourself. This is the one time of year to masturbate, unless you're a sinner.

It's national jerk off day!! Finally!!

by peepeepoopooman420 October 11, 2022

Jerk Off a guy November

Every girl has to jerk pff a guy through out the month of november

A:”her today is nov. 1st
B:”ok, i’ll meet you at your house in an hour”
A:”yup, because is jerk off a guy november

by ywBoys October 23, 2019

Sex addicted jamesy jerking off to crap

my theory is that (ANALOG HORROR CREATOR) isn't working on (ANALOG HORROR) because (SEXUAL REASON)!!! surely this wont make every (ANALOG HORROR) fan uncomfortable!
(makes every (ANALOG HORROR) fan uncomfortable)
GRR... HOW DARE THESE PEOPLE GET UNCOMFORTABLE BECAUSE I SEXUALIZE (ANALOG HORROR CREATOR) FOR NOT WORKING ON (ANALOG HORROR)!!!!
I CAN'T BELIEVE NOBODY WILL LET ME SEXUALIZE MINORS!!! HOW DO YOU EXPECT ME TO REACT!!!

Sex addicted jamesy jerking off to crap is WEIRD!!!

by 1willwoodfan0 May 30, 2023