A fork of Rural Dictionary
Somebody who physically or digitally stalks a target as well as their friends and/or family members.
My sister's ex is such an umbrella stalker. He stalks her and her best friend. He used three different names to try friending and messaging me on Facebook.
A declaration of apology stated by the individual preceding future infractions. Most commonly used in romantic relationships to excuse derogatory comments, masochistic tendencies, and general inconsiderations to avoid denial of sexual intercourse.
She was mad when I slapped her ass in front of my boys, but I used my Apology Umbrella so I'm still gonna tap that tonight.
A gut so big that your SO can give you oral sex in the rain and still stay dry.
It was pouring outside when my woman gave me oral sex. She stayed dry because my love umbrella covered her.