A fork of Rural Dictionary
when your taking a big shit, and it hits the toilet water and then, the water splashes your a-hole. (Just like a kid cannonballing into the pool)
Dude I just gave myself a ghetto bidet
a naturally occurring spring or geyser one uses to bathe the genital and perineal areas of the body
Unhappy Camper: I forgot my toilet paper when I came to camp at Yellowstone and now i have to poop but there's only cacti to relieve the poo from my bottom. What should I do?
Local: Well you should use Nature's Bidet. Go poop on that mound over there and don't get up until 35 or 120 minutes have passed.
When you have run out of toilet paper and you call your cousin Cletus or equivalent to come and do you a solid and use his stream of urine to clean your chocolate covered starfish.
“Yeah I ran out of toilet paper and I had to give my cousin a call to come and give me an Appalachian bidet to get clean.”
Taking a shit and then hopping in the shower and using the shower to clean off your butthole, preferably with a jet setting.
Yeah, toilet paper is a scam. I just hop in the shower and do the ol' american bidet and then use a little soap.
The act of shitting in your side-loading washing machine, then using it to clean yourself.
Theres a line for the bathroom, I guess it's time for an American bidet.
Getting a dog to lick ones butthole after going number two.
My colleague Josh trained his labrador to give him an American bidet--- god damn, you should see how happy the dog is afterwards.
When you poop and it plops into the water and splashes your bottom.
"That just splashed all over me!"
"Poor man's bidet"