A fork of Rural Dictionary
Possibly the lamest band in existence. Their entire catalogue is nearly a carbon copy of a short phase Radiohead went through before moving onto other things like people with actual artistic talent tend to do. Coldplay's lyrics are horridly generic, and their lead singer (Chris Martin) likes to wallow in his own sadness and deliver all his lines as if he's about to start crying at any second like a giant doucher.
Coldplay fans often claim to like the band on the grounds that their lyrics are really provocative and profound. It is best to avoid all interaction with these people, as their semi-retardation has been proven to be contagious. They can be identified by the shit stains around their eyes, nose, and mouth due to them habitually burying their heads in their own, and each other's, anuses
Coldplay fan: Dude WTF!? I passed off these Coldplay lyrics as my own work for this poetry assignment in English, didn't get caught, and STILL got a D!! Plus now the short bus shows up at my house every day before school to pick me up! FML!
Person with any musical knowledge whatsoever: Just stay at least 10 feet away from me dude.
12-year-old girl: Hey Chris Martin, thanks for coming over to have sex with me.
Chris Martin: Are you kidding? I like men. I just need your diary to write 12 new songs for the next Coldplay album.
A very talented band who make amazing music.
I'm going to listen to 'Parachutes' by Coldplay because they are a very talanted band who make amazing music!
From the 40-Year Old Virgin: You know how I know you're gay? Because you listen to Coldplay.
Seriously, these guys suck.
Coldplay sucks more than $2 whore.
A band from Britain containing four powerful and intelligent members, Chris Martin (vocals), Jon Buckland (guitar), Guy Berryman (bass) and Will Champion (drums). Originally called Starfish, they first hit it big with their song "Yellow" which is on their debut album, Parachutes. Since their first album in 2000, they have released two more sensational albums, recently releasing X&Y which became the best-seller in Europe and America.
Coldplay gets a lot of crap from people who dislike them. It's either you love Coldplay or you hate Coldplay. However, Coldplay writes very philosophical lyrics and people complain and say that they want to be the next U2, but they sound nothing like U2, but they sound like Radiohead, but both bands are still stellar.
Chris Martin is currently the poster child for the Make Trade Fair charities and for OXFAM.
Coldplay does some amazing work both on and offstage. We all should be thinking about what they're doing for the world instead of maybe hating on them like many people like to do.
1. A shitty newb Brit band that thinks they're the greatest band in the world, as claimed by Chris Martin.
2. A band that fails to realize they suck, and that they should bow down to the likes of Radiohead, U2, Oasis, and Depeche Mode.
3. Any band capable of producing/performing fucking annoying music, as demonstrated by their song "Clocks" - which redundantly cycles the same scales of notes for the entirety of the track.
4. A band in which any of its members give their children stupid names like "Apple"
5. A band that relies on simple riffs and time signatures, lacking the complexity that bands like Radiohead are capable of writing in the their sleep.
"Haha Greatest band in the world? You guys gotta me shittin' me, you stupid Coldplay!"
"This song must be by a Coldplay because it's driving me fucking insane."
"Hey, that sounds like an easy song to play/write. Is that a Coldplay track?"
"Oh, you named your kid Orange? So you must be part of a Coldplay."
"This can't be the work of Ed O'Brien. It's got the simplicity of a Coldplay."
"Thom Yorke has more skills on the guitar, piano, and vocals than the frontman of this Coldplay."
a wonderful band.
go see a concert its beautiful.
in an awesome way.
look at the stars
look how they shine for you
and all the things that you do