Country Dictionary

The act of lying face down randomly in a public place with no intentions at all. Your arms are at your side and your feet are together.

Conor: Dude, lets go mulch style at the mall!

Someone who can't do anything right,they are unevolved and are basically useless.

"Man Domonik is such a mulch monkey"

The sudden unnoticed advancement of time when hanging out with a particular individual.

Wow, it’s 3 am already?! The damn Mulch Effect gets me every time I hang out with you!

Dropping hints and information to start to grow a relationship with another, romantic or otherwise

“Wow! Andy is sooo hot! I wish I could get with him!”
“Whelp, start mulching now if you want him to be interested in time for homecoming.”

Alyssa Mulch is one of the sweetest and chillest girls you can meet. She’s extremely loyal and funny. Alyssa Mulch is definitely one of a kind. She’s quite the crackhead and would do anything to make you smile. She definitely some bundle of joy.

Alyssa Mulch is really cool. I think I wanna become friends with her.

When a woman lights a man's pubes on fire while giving a blowjob.

The fire alarm was worth it when we found out Harriet was Smokin' Mulch.

It's when a person kills a prostitute (or runaway- someone nobody will miss), has sex with her, and buries the body. Some months later, they dig up the body and put their opened mouth between the deceased's legs while a friend jumps on her stomach. The woman's decaying insides (including the perpetrator's old sperm) spurt into his mouth.

As a threat- If you're not careful, I'ma mulch-bag your sister.

As an insult- You dirty mulch-bagger.

As an activity- "What'd you guys do last night?" "Just a little mulch bagging"