A fork of Rural Dictionary
intoxicated; inebriated.
monkeyed
"I was so monkeyed last night, I couldn't even remember the fifteenth drink'
The art of one man fingering another man using the ring and middle finger together. Usually accruing at a social gathering or party using a sneak attack.
Dude, you just got the shit monkeyed out of you
One of the three primary ingredients of a good game.
Nothing in life can not be improved with either monkeys, pirates or ninjas
The soon to be rulers of all mankind.
The monkeys will rise. The transformation begins.
Today I want to talk about "Spanking the Monkey". The term is used as a euphemism for male masturbation. It is generally only used between close friends and not toward a person of authority. The history behind the phrase is a mystery, no one quite knows how it came to be. It does not have a direct relationship to the actual act. The phrase indicates that your penis is a monkey and that it has been very bad.
"Last night I spanked my monkey 8 times."
"If you keep spanking your monkey like that, you'll go blind and grow hair on your palms."