A fork of Rural Dictionary
A deleteriously diminutive, overcompensating and money-grubbing manlet boy who futilely seeks to overcome his devastatingly desolating manletism by imprudently purchasing expensive goods such as gold-plated high heels and jewel-encrusted step stools. The puny materialistic manlet can often be detected as he effeminately prances around in upscale boutiques, accompanied by his giggling and squabbling clique of preposterously petite, pint-sized materialistic manlet girlfriends. Here the seriously stunted silly sissy manlets put on tiny, little fashion shows by daintily skipping along a catwalk consisting of an empty shoe box as the delusional runway manlets delightedly display their prospective new short shorts, summer dresses and high heels while the surrounding fawning manlet fairies shower them with rose petals and girlishly sip strawberry margaritas out of pink ampoules.
Manmore 1: Lol, look at that garishly dressed materialistic manlet prancing around wearing his new mink coat and gold-plated high heels! Manmore 2: At least it only cost one poor minklet his life to make that microscopic manlet's lilliputian, little coatlet. Manmore 1: Hahahahaha!
Manlet (a male shorter than 5ft10) detected. Employed to draw attention to the discovery of the location of a manlet. Comically stunted, terminally insecure and brimming with manlet rage, the puny manlet can often be detected when he is blowing in the wind like a leaf outside, stumbling around in public wearing high heels on the way to visit his prison daddy or seethingly glaring at you from the accursed depths of the manlet pit in your local gym.
Hey, why is that child rolling around on the ground over there? Manlet detected - it's Tiny Todd Howard, I think he is wrestling with an earthworm! Lol, that worm must be like an anaconda to that petite and insignificant manlet boy!
The top secret manlet (stunted sissy boys shorter than 5ft10) plan to somehow sneakily overthrow the rightfully ruling magnificent manmores (6ft+ tall real men) and average height (5ft10/11) men who naturally terrify them and to then finally live in a fictional manlet paradise where high heels are free and height actually doesn't matter (because everybody is a devastatingly dwarfed and girlishly gnomish manlet queen). Here the microscopically minuscule midget manlet monstrosities would of course live completely segregated from all womenfolk because even when there isn't a single manmore left on earth, obviously no women is going to consent to committing social suicide by dating a preposterously petite and scandalously stunted, puny little manlet princess. And so the inherently effeminate manlet fairies are then forced to replicate by means of mitosis, a fact that amusingly doesn't prevent them from perpetrating aggressive mating attempts upon one another and collectively engaging in mortifyingly futile manlet mating rituals in front of basketball arenas and microbiology labs. Manlets, when will they learn?
Manmore 1: Do you think that the Bagel Boss Manlet would be the ladylike leader of a short-lived and subsequently subjugated manlet uprising or would the dubious honor got to Todd "Turbo-manlet" Howard? Manmore 2: Tiny Todd "Stacked Heels" Howard, for sure! Manmore 1: Todd "High Heeled Homunculus" Howard it is then. Manmore 2: Manlets rise up!
The completely and utterly delusional, laughably pathetic and farcical method of calculation by which the petite and effeminate runt of a sissy manlet boy unconscionably inflates his shamefully diminutive and dwarfish short stature.
Microscopic turbo-manlet: I'm 5ft4 - let's round that up to 5ft5. If I stand on my tippy toes, then I'm 5ft6. Plus, when I wear my favorite pair of high heels, I'm 5ft8. So that's basically 5ft10. If I now translate that into guy height, then I'm 6ft tall - finally a big boy (starts crying). Towering manmore: Just lol at you and your manlet mathematics. That's nothing more than spurious and elflike mental gymnastics. Manlets, when will they learn?
The military manlet is an overcompensating manlet boy who, in a fit of Napoleon complex-induced insanity, has signed up for active duty with the United States Armed Forces. Here the useless and effeminate manlets are generally used as cannon fodder when deployed in the absurd spectacle known as the manlet wave attack tactic, but can also be traded as war brides, serve as portable human shields or can be used as an emergency fortification when stacked up as a barricade in lieu of sandbags. The military manlet is always keen to raise the morale of the actual soldiers in his platoon by donning an Oompa Loompa costume and dancing a merry jig atop a mess hall table as the surrounding military manlets clap in unison while dancing in a circle like the fairies that they are and all the manmores pelt him with height boosting insoles. As an encore Manletlyn Monroe performs smash hits such as "High Heels Are A Manlets Best Friend" and "Bye Bye Masculinity" to further entertain the troops.
Why is that pantsed military manlet lying face down in the mud over there? The silly sissy manlet broke one of his high heels while prancing around on the obstacle course and threw a hissy fit, so the real soldiers just left him there. Never leave a man behind - that obviously doesn't apply to manlets.
A grotesquely gnomish gaggle of ganged-up, overcompensating turbo-manlets who have, in a childish, desperate and doomed attempt at overcoming their crippling manletism, decided to form a midget gang. Once a diminutively dwarfed new recruit has been sexed-into the gang, it is mandatory for him to participate in typical gang activities, for example: tagging up turf by spray-painting garden gnomes at knee height onto garbage cans and pet doors, drinking Tall Boys and huffing Jenkem, prancing around naked except for high heels and assless chaps in their hobbit-hole of a gang hideout while towel snapping each other's posteriors in an effort to toughen themselves up, telling deeply embarrassing tall tales about how they used to be the biggest kid in preschool, injecting themselves with stolen bovine somatotropin in a futile and injudicious bid at escaping their inevitable fate of becoming a prison wife manlet once caught by the law and incarcerated and frantically praying in front of the countless Randy Newman posters adorning the walls of the manlet pit in their hobbit-hole gang hideout while repetitively reciting the lyrics of their favorite song Short People due to their shared obsession with the delusional hope of being blessed with an adult-onset growth spurt by their beloved God and hero Saint Newman.
Jessica: Lol, why are there a bunch of garden gnomes standing on the corner over there? Olivia: It's just a Short People manlet gang. Here, take my magnifying glass and have a closer look. Can you see that they got little hands, little eyes, that they walk around tellin' great big lies? They got little noses and tiny little teeth. Unsurprisingly they wear platform shoes on their nasty, little feet. Jessica: Oh yeah, they got little baby legs and they stand so low - I'd have to pick one of them up just to say hello! Olivia: Well, I don't want no short people 'round here. Jessica: Short people got no reason.
The cerebrally and physically stunted myopic manlet is a microscopic mental midget of a minuscule manlet boy, who shortsightedly sees only the literally subhuman suffering of his own small-minded dwarven kind because, due to his eternal inability to grow up and be the bigger man, big picture thinking goes right over his pea-brained, little head. Deceased myopic manlets can often be found squashed flat as a pancake on country roads next to their close relative the, by comparison majestic, toad. Myopic manlets can easily be driven to venting their pent-up manlet rage and throwing a hissy fit with innocent questions and observations, such as: "Manlet detected.", "Nice high heels, my girlfriend has the same pair.", "Are you classified as a turbo-manlet? How tall are you?", "Aren't you the midget who played the manletservant Nick Nack in The Man with the Golden Gun?"
Manmore 1: Hey, why is that little girl crying in front of that beauty salon? Manmore 2: Myopic manlet detected. I think his new acrylic nails broke off when he got mauled by that chihuahua over there. Manmore 1: Lol, the victorious chihuahua even took the sissy manlet's high heels! Manmore 2: Manlets rise up!