A fork of Rural Dictionary
A human with a severely limited understanding of nutrition who sincerely believes that depending on big pharma supplements is a viable and healthy long-term solution to getting bad fee-fees when they think about sad cows.
Vegans are typically unable to think for themselves and never do their own research; instead they rely on Hollywood actors and Instagram influencers to tell them what is good and what is bad. Despite their clear lack of original thought, they will typically legitimately think that they came to any conclusion on their own.
If you encounter a vegan in the wild, it will not take long before they start spouting sound bites from Netflix propaganda pieces. Once you start pressing them on details about the clearly nutrition-deficient diet, they will quickly deflect and tell you they'll link you a video and that it contains everything you need to know, because they certainly fucking don't.
Every single vegan in existence will also claim to care about gender equality, environmentalism and universal healthcare. They also browse reddit and smoke weed but they could totally stop at any time, it's not addictive bro.
- Hello, how do you do
- I'm a vegan
- Ok retard fuck off
someone who says they're a vegan about 6 times without anyone asking and instead of eating meat they slaughter plants and fruits for fun
vegan: i'm vegan
random person: i dont care
vegan: im better than you
random person: wtf
getting asked where you get your protein like 12 times a day
"If you don't know the difference between vegan's and vegetarian's, a vegan is way more annoying." -
"Shut-up, I don't need meat!" - P. Lawson
Someone who, for reasons of personal principle, follows a strict vegetarian diet and boycotts wool, silk, leather, and sometimes zoos. Does not require one to be affluent, to humble-brag, or to be contemptuous of and faux-horrified at everyone who's not a vegan; is nonetheless correlated with all of the above.
"I have mixed feelings on vegans; it seems like either they teach you how to bake without using eggs, or they say that you should be skinned alive for wearing shearling."
The breathtakingly beautiful act of preforming anal in a decalcified browneye. As vegans do not consume meat, dairy, or eggs their colons move much faster and have no backlogs; providing a much more pleasant experience.
Veganal is as clean as smashing watermelons.