A fork of Rural Dictionary
The response to any "why" question that anyone asks you.
Young Peter: Why did all the dinosaurs die out? Tour Guide: Because you touch yourself at night.
The truly ultimate responce to any kind of stupid or annoying "why" question, or simply to a question you cannot answer. That answer will totally piss off annoying kids who ask too many questions. See also: because you're gay.
Kid: Why did the dinosaurs die out? Tour guide: Because you touch yourself at night. Son: Why do you drink so much, dad? Dad: Because you touch yourself at night! Little brother: Why don't you ever let me into your room? Big brother: Because you touch yourself at night, you little brat!
a funny phrase to say after any question
Friend: Why do i suck? Me: Because you touch yourself at night