A fork of Rural Dictionary
When you take a shit in the shower and decide to stomp on the turd to mash it down the drain.
I don’t buy toilet paper anymore, I just shit in the shower and waffle stomp it down the drain.
A man who willingly funds their ex girlfriends lifestyle while she’s getting blown out and throat f**ked by other guys, and later comes home from work to shove his average size penis into a gaping hole filled with the semen of all his friends, family and neighbors.
“Nik, don’t be such a Nimp. She literally has the neighborhoods semen pouring out of her ear holes, she doesn’t deserve to be taken out to a nice dinner”
When you are embarrassed by your ex girlfriend for leaving a snail trail of other dudes semen behind her everywhere she walks, so you decide to crack a few eggs over your head and let the goo slowly run down your face so you can feel like a cumshot whore without the risk of ruining your self esteem.
Random man: “Jesus Christ man, tell your lady to grab a f**king mop! I almost slipped on her snail trail.” Nik: “Omg brother I’m so embarrassed (pulled 2 eggs from his pocket and cracks them over his head) now I have egg on my face.”
When you get mounted by a dog and the red rocket goes in….and in an effort to save face, you try to act tough and start barking and grunting like a giga chad.
Dog: Woof! Woof! I’m gonna mount that man! Nik: Oh no, not again! Innocent bystander: Bro that dog is inside you! Nik: (Obviously embarrassed) Arf! Arf! I got that dog in me! Get on my level!
When a girl is getting mouth fucked and you bust in her mouth so she sounds like a gobbling turkey
Luke: I was mouth fucking this chick last night and when I was cumming she started gobbling like a sperm turkey.....I was so jealous that she got to experience that.
When you consume so much semen that you get sick and start puking and shitting semen everywhere.
Bengals fans: I guzzled so much semen over the weekend after celebrating our first winning season in 10 years. I think I got semenilla, it won't stop pouring out of my ass and I keep puking.
Another word for someone who guzzles cum
Luke: I think I want some tea instead of coffee Tyler: So in other words, you like to guzzle cum. Fucking tea drinker