A fork of Rural Dictionary
The act of taking one or more epic dumps. Usually, this term is used when you're making multiple trips to the throne for various reasons like, taking a laxative, getting bubble guts from eating White Castle, or doing a purge or a cleanse.
I was constipated after taking some antibiotics, so I took some milk of magnesia and I was deucing it up for like 9 straight hours. I filled that cup to the brim and shot it down like bourbon.
Stands for: Daily Dump On Company Time. Reserved for the people who save their morning dumps for work so that they can be paid for taking a shit. If you spend 10 minutes a day taking a crap at work, it is the equivalent of over one week of vacation (43 hours).
Guy 1: after this meeting, i have to take my DDOCT. Guy 2: thanks for the heads up, i'm going to a different floor to piss.
An excellent retort to people who are dispensing advice to you, that is pretty common knowledge and you already know. Usually, it's delivered to some novice who is attempting to be helpful, but is really just annoying you.
Noob: Make sure you stack that charcoal in a pyramid shape, with spacing between the briquettes. Pro: It's not my first rodeo. I know how to stack, fluid, and feed the flame...I've probably forgotten more about grilling than you'll ever know...
A person who has surpassed the moniker of a "douche bag". These people are the cream of the crop / elite of "douche bags" and deserve a unique, differentiating term for them, like "executive douche bag". Any random person can be a "douche bag", but enema bags are mired in their own sense of self importance in the world.
That enema bag dude in the skinny, bejeweled jeans, was trying to tell me his theory on stock market technical analysis and couldn't have been more incorrect. I think he should spend more time tanning and less time trying to impress others with failed theories.
When something of value is stolen, and everyone who was in charge of safeguarding the valuable claims ignorance of just about anything. People in charge who confronted with questions about the valuable items usually answer, "I just dont know where it is" or claim that the valuables were "vaporized" when it was their job to know. This comes from the MF Global scandal, and their CEO Jon Corzine, who stole 1.6 billion dollars of client money testified that he didn't know where the money was or where it went. Several other financial officers of the firm also claim total ignorance of everything and claim the money was "vaporized". Apparently claiming total ignorance of everything also clears you of all criminal charges as well.
Dude 1 - I trusted Mike to watch my cooler of beer last night when I took my girlfriend home. When I came back, all my beer was gone. Dude 2 - I didn't see him anywhere near it man, he was talking to some whores when you were gone. Dude 1 - oh shit, I just got corzined! I can't even confront him about it because he'll probably kick my ass. Dude 2 - looks like you learned a painful lesson. Don't trust Mike with your beer.
The anger that people feel when they find out they've been lied to about vaccines, in general. They've either had a bad reaction, or know a friend or loved one who has. Combined with the constant propagandizing about the vaccine and booster, especially in children has worn people down, and people are getting sick of it.
Steve: Did you hear about Jason's wife? She got her 2nd dose and became paralyzed. Bob: The vaxxlash is coming soon, my friend, the amount of fraud we were sold here is astronomical.
As you browse your twitter feed, and stumble upon someone being outraged about something that appears rather innocuous. You check the twitter profile of some insane NPC or SJW of a random outrage brigade, to detect if they have gender pronouns in their profile description. If they do, they "have pronouns", and of course they are to be mocked and ignored. Usually they have random blue wave icons as their display name also.
NPC tweet: THAT's WHY HE IS NOT MY PRESIDENT!!!1 Normie tweet: Why does everyone who is offended have pronouns? NPC tweet: HOW DARE YOU ASSUME MY GENDER!!!!!!!!!!! *outrage*