Country Dictionary

Speed-bag

A cousin to the "motorboat." Where one places there face on the scrotum and "motorboats" instead of the breasts.

Tired of the routine foreplay, Emile insisted on a quick speed-bag prior to fellatio to get him going.

Alpaca

As everyone knows, the alpaca is a South American quadruped known for spitting. This inspires the name given for insemination by spitting semen into the vagina. This is a requirement for impregnation for men with a micropenis. The technical maneuver involves masturbation of the micropenis into one's hand, ingesting and then spitting into the vagina.

Robert and his wife are expecting a baby girl in September. Obviously, he performed the alpaca successfully, given that he's nearly dickless.