Country Dictionary

A fork of Rural Dictionary

Texas Corn Cob

When you've eaten a huge family meal and finally you b begin to upshot the largest turd in your life and it feels like birthing a corn cob.

Oh Lawdy Lawdy, here comes another Texas Corn Cob! gonna need a second flush and some cleanser.

by Lothar January 14, 2018

Kettle Corn

When you're taking a horrible shit and its splattering all over the toilet bowl.

Damn dude! Im putting out some serious kettle corn here!

by Lothar January 14, 2018

Jack Frost

When a man masturbates in sub-zero weather and the ejaculate freezes before it hits the ground.

It's so cold out here I could Jack Frost

by Lothar January 14, 2018

Toasted Almonds

When a guy farts really bad while sitting on a vinyl cafe booth and the gas escapes to the front of his crotch.

Holy crap man, I just toasted almonds!

by Lothar December 14, 2017

Cranberry Dream

When a girl begins her period while sleeping and stains the sheets.

Dammit! I had another cranberry dream last night!

by Lothar January 14, 2018

Deforestation

When a really hairy person begins to remove body hair

Damn man! we got some serious deforestation going on here!

by Lothar January 14, 2018

Porcelain Baptism

When you're a well hung man and you lean forward sitting on the toilet and the tip of your penis hits the water giving you a cold wet surprise

ah Crap! I just gave myself a porcelain baptism again.

by Lothar January 14, 2018