A fork of Rural Dictionary
One of the few Mormons who openly practices polygamy and doesn't do statutory rape and/or breed too much. The only Mormons to grow a set and stand up for what they believe in.
The cycle-accurate Mormon went to his home and hugged his 2 wives and his husband.
Going to school against your will has the equivalent life-shortening effect of smoking 94,254 cigarettes. 8 hours a day times 180 days a year times 60 minutes divided by 11 minutes lost per cigarette. This calculation doesn't take into account homework, so the number of cigarettes would be even higher.
One valuable thing I learned from school is to never have children so they won't have to go through what I did.
A public restroom missing so much as ONE of these 21st century features: 1. Infrared automatic faucets that stay on as long as you are moving your hands 2. Automatic hand dryer and/or automatic paper towels 3. Self flushing toilet/urinal 4. Automatic soap
Don't go in that McDonalds down the street if you have 7 year diarrhea, they only have a twentieth century bathroom.
In a May-December relationship, a way to describe the younger partner, especially when the younger partner looks like it hasn't passed puberty yet. May be a warning that a statutory rape could happen.
52 year old Schizo Woman:I just got a boyfriend, he's kinda young. Rosanne:How young? Is he milk money young? 52 year old Schizo Woman:He's 14.
An electronics project consisting of an oscillator and a high RMS wattage tweeter. When run it generates an high-powered ultrasonic sound that annoys dogs and causes them to stop barking (woofing).
My neighbor's dog was keeping me awake at night so I fired up my anti woofer tweeter so I could sleep.
Harakiri, seppuku, belly cutting. It's when you take a samurai sword and carve into the skin and fat of your abdomen and as you feel the pain, reach into the bloody mess and pull out your guts. Most likely you die from a lack of blood. Some more cowardly samurai would get their friend to chop off their head to ease the pain.
My geisha left me, my trainer got shot with arrows, and my bird ran away...I'm slitting my stomach. I'm a manly samurai--I'm slitting my stomach, and I don't want any assistance as I go on my instant trip to an eternal vacation.
Male masturbation. So called because the previous Pope was Polish, and the male organ looked like a Mitre and polishing it gives the user pleasure
More children would be happier if more priests would stay at home and polish the pope.