Country Dictionary

The number of years older than you a porn star really is, even though she may be your exact same age.

The math works like this:

1 year in porn = 5 years additional age.

So, for example, a person who is 33 and has been in porn for 9 years is really 33 + (9*5) = 78.

Me and the star of "Ass Angels" are both the same age, 33, but in doggystyle years, she's really 78.

To take the usernames and passwords you have gotten via phishing techniques and then max the credit cards and drain the bank accounts of the target.

Phished his infoz then bent him over and gave him the phist.

Phisting is when, after your usernames and passwords have been phished, your credit cards are maxed and your bank accounts drained.

I was phished, then phisted, in less than 24 hours. Worst phisting I've ever had.

Dirty laundry is that stuff that you keep super secret but over time - sometimes decades - 1 or more people find out about.

Facebook laundry is that stuff you keep super secret but five hundred million people find out about 15 seconds after it was shoring up for the slow maturation of being relatively discreet, dirty laundry.

John Cocktoastin: I, John Cocktoastin, have just been caught cheating (for over a year) on my wife of 7 years and my 6 year old daughter with T. Audry Lolitta. I am a lying scumbag who doesn't even care enough to break it off with the woman I'm cheating with and try to make it work. ASS.

P.Aserby: Now this is truly a special moment in the history of Facebook Laundry. Way to leave facebook logged in, John. Oh, and also that cheating thing. Both bad.

To have sex with your partner on the bathroom counter, in the shower, on the floor, on the table, from behind while on the couch, on the kitchen counter, pressed up against the refrigerator...all in the space of 90 minutes, as if your environment where a jungle and it was your mission as a sex-crazed tarzan/jane to explore every orifice of it before your parents come home.

Bob: You and Becky finally hookup?
Chris: Yah, we jungle fucked for hours.
Bob: Damage assessment?
Chris: Broke a mirror in the bathroom, jacked up her shower doors and both ended up with rug burns on our backs and knees.
Bob: So totally worth it then?
Chris: Duh.

How to describe the girl you love when she does something contrary to what you want. In hindsight, you realize, wow, that bitch was right.

I had that pussy LINED UP bro, but my douchebag girlfriend cockblocked me.

The error message you receive when attempting to connect to the cloud on 4/20.

Billy: It's 4/20, broheim, did you wake and bake?
Becky: NO! Jeff broke the glass bong yesterday, we're all out of papers, and I couldn't find my pipe.
Billy: ooooo 420 error. cloud not found.