A fork of Rural Dictionary
a feeling that one is in the body of the wrong species
Alyssa: I told the shrink that I feel like a wild animal trapped in a human body, and she said it sounds like classic species dysphoria. Jacques: I know I was meant to be a dolphin. Why did I end up a sexy human instead?? Species dysphoria sucks. Jerry: If only I'd been born a bird, I wouldn't have to spend so much money on flying, parachuting, hang-gliding, sky-diving and base-jumping. Damned species dysphoria.
Someone with a talent ("gift") for wrapping presents.
Hey, you hear about Cristy? She just got a job as a wrap artist for a gift boutique to help pay her way through design school.
What you should definitely include in your zombie apocalypse kit frozen compartment.
Mom: "Hey kids! What flavors of Apocalypsicles should I buy for our zombie kit?"
The condition in which you think you forgot, or actually forgot, to close something important - your car, front door, stove, etc.
I can't remember if I locked the car. I must be getting Openheimer's. Damn, I left the car open again. I've got Openheimer's for sure!
The condition in which a really nasty viral infection causes your mind and memory to shut down
William: I felt so sick this weekend, I didn't even check my calendar and I totally forgot about Kate's party. Phil: Sounds like you just had a bad case of Fluzheimer's. Besides, Harry was there and he grossed everyone out.
A condition seen in aging baby-boomers in which the sight of a much younger gorgeous person causes acute memory loss.
Betty: "I'd just finished checking out at the supermarket yesterday when I saw the most incredible sexy young guy in the next line. I walked around a little bit to get some better views and then I followed him to his car. I was about to drive after him, but when I got to my car, I realized I'd left my hand bag at the counter. By the time I rushed back, he was gone." Boopsie: "I'd say you got a really bad case of Ogleheimer's."
The message sent by a dog peeing on a tree, fire hydrant, etc, and received by another dog's sniffing.
"Stop yanking my leash, dude. I'm trying to read my pmail." From: Alpha Male To: All Subject: Love and War New stud in town. 25" tall. Good genes. Looking for healthy bitch in heat. Will fight all rivals. Reply: Hey big guy - I'm your mate. Check this out and come get me.