Country Dictionary

A fork of Rural Dictionary

Johnny Deeper

Johnny Deeper is a fictional young boy who appears in a number of sexually explicit anecdotes referred to as "Johnny Deeper Jokes". These stories are passed around elementary school age males, and may to many represent first exposure to sexually themed humor. Most stories center around the character Johnny Deeper fornicating with teachers or being vulgar in the classroom; hence the series enduring popularity with the age group. Some jokes are very simple and play only off Johnny's surname, while others, far more complex, just represent Johnny as a vulgar, but ultimately innocent and loveable elementary school student.

Little Johnny Deeper's mother comes home and catches him on his girlfriend and yells, "Johnny Deeper" and Johnny replies "Gee Mom, I'm in as deep as I can go".

by Darker August 12, 2010

furious mastrabation

An act of self-pleasure intended purely for the function of dealing with cronic stress. In many cases; this form of masturbation is grossly satirized with descriptions of men grinding their teeth, audibly growling, and exhibiting a pulsating forehead vein.

Larry : Dude writing my thesis fucking sucks. I'm going to fucking kill myself. Barry : Dude ... take it easy man you know ... go home ... have a sandwich. Larry : We are fucking beyond sandwiches here. Barry : Have you tried furious mastrabation? Larry : Furious masturbation? Barry : Masturbating FURIOUSLY, just grabbing that little purple soldier and choking the fucking life out of him while you sit and think about how much your life fucking sucks. Larry : You’re a genius Barry. I now understand why that bruise on your temple has never healed.

by Darker January 21, 2010

Number two happy meal

During the physical act of lovemaking a man first inserts his penis directly into his partners asshole he then proceeds to quickly consume a strategically placed fast food item, while additionally attempting to keep his member securly in his partners anus. Special care will often be taken such that the subjugated party first hears the removal of the wrapping from the fast food, and then is confronted by the stark realization that their partner is in fact enjoying both decadence of anal sex and white trash american foodstuffs.

Jason : Hey dude you know what I did to Katie last night? Roger : What man ? Jason : I gave her the old number two happy meal --- she wouldn't even look at me afterward. It was fucking epic.

by darker May 11, 2009

Bipolar Betty

She's fat. She's crazy. She's legally bipolar. She is a "Bipolar Betty". "Bipolar Betty" is a term that can used to describe any of the countless number of fat insane girls that a person has to deal with at work or at school. Typically, your local Bipolar Betty will be found either making an inordinate amount of noise or sobbing loudly. She will have NO emotional middle ground. It's either all on ON or all OFF. She will also be huge. We're talking not just a plumper, but the full pork pie. Interact with at your own risk.

Barry : Dude you've gotta see this fucking retard we got working the help desk, she's a real fucking Bipolar Betty. Winfield : You mean legally? Barry : Hundred percent dude she got this job on an anti-discrimination beef. Winfield : Dude that fucking sucks. I had a Bipolar Better two years ago in R&D and if she hadn't OD'ed on Aspirin we'd probably be the next division to getting canned. I mean individually she brought the whole workplace down. People who loved this job were leaving at 4:30 just to get away from her. It's just one of those things you know ... God shit on that person. Barry : Funny that you mention God. Winfield : Why? Barry : She's a Mormon this week. Winfield : Ha. Joseph Smith didn't see this one coming magical seeing stones my ass.

by Darker April 28, 2010

Chippewa Guido

A Western NY phenomena; the so-called "Chippewa Guido" represents an amalgamated term used to disparage a group of men who walk the line between homosexual and heterosexual and who frequent the ale houses along West Chippewa St. in Buffalo, NY. As the name implies, this group is represented by "men" of roughly Italian origin however, in recent years some of both Middle Eastern and Latino decent may also join their ranks based on considered adoption of meterosexual fashion. A Chippewa Guido can be recognized by several key traits. The first is hair gel - the more the better. The second is that they are inordinately loud, and will scream at helpless televisions despite the fact that the people on the TV cannot hear them. Third, they talk about their sexual conquests incessantly. As to mating, one or more Chippewa Guido's will often attempt to approach on a single lady or group of ladies and will then will attempt to enthrall them using a semi-erotic courtship display. The prevalence and success of such acts weather or not they result in coitus are used within the group establish pack-dominance.

Roger : I fucking hate this bar, it cost me 10$ to get in and the whole place is stuffed with sausage. Helen : It's not as bad as you think look at the Chippewa Guido’s over there. I don't think they are a threat to you. Roger : Your thinking sword fighting ? Helen : I'm just saying. When men hook up, you win. I mean look at this place there are more men than women, but most of these dudes are probably going home together. Roger : You make an excellent point, but I really don't like the way that Turkish dude is looking at my package. Let's get the fuck out of here.

by Darker January 21, 2010

Ghetto Black Friday Sale

A "ghetto black Friday sale" describes any home robbery that takes place in the days immediately following the Black Friday shopping extravaganza. It is assumed that homes are targeted during this time due to an increased chance of new electronics being present in the house, and a general interest by local burglars in sharing in the holiday shopping tradition.

Kevin : So there was a ghetto black Friday sale at my house yesterday. Dave : You mean some black people broke into your house and stole your family's stuff? Kevin : Pretty much.

by Darker November 29, 2010

Ghetto Black Friday Sale

A "ghetto black Friday sale" describes any home robbery that takes place in the days immediately following the Black Friday shopping extravaganza. It is assumed that homes are targeted during this time due to an increased chance of new electronics being present in the house, and a general interest by local burglars in sharing in the holiday shopping tradition.

Kevin : So there was a ghetto black Friday sale at my house yesterday. Dave : You mean some black people broke into your house and stole your family's stuff? Kevin : Pretty much.

by Darker November 29, 2010