A fork of Rural Dictionary
A hoopty is beat-up, piece of shit car with a rusted-out body, a bad transmission, and an engine that only runs on sunny days!
Can I borrow $2? I gotta put gas in my hoopty!
An automobile which is most likely older than it's owner, but not old enough to be an eye-catching classic. Sporting a very dull paint job and Psoriasis-like rust spots, do-it-yourself tints with more bubbles than a freshly opened champaign bottle, a fully installed racing drivers seat (with the other seats left stock and most likely broken/torn), 5" plastic (or for more well-off hoopty drivers, aluminium) rims bought at a local Wal-Mart, and a rice-class muffler which belches out a large jet ski like sound, possibly so that the driver can attract the attention of blind chicks who otherwise can't be disguised by the hideousness of this vehicle.
*Hoopty comes fart canning alongside to a chick walking with a blind tapping cane* Driver: "Hey baby, need a ride?" Chick: "What kind of car you got?" Driver: "It's a Ford GT" Chick: "Really!?" Chick's friend: "He's lying. It's a 1986 Honda CRX. Let's take the bus instead"
A busted ass car with a bumper atached with wire thats put on wrong so you cant open the hood to replace the brake fluid and you have to drive using the emergency brake.Also the muffler is so loud you need to drown with the "stereo" that is probably worth more than the car.
A junky, wothless car that the owner had put money into that only makes it look worse. Or even comical. Examples would be spinning plastic hubcaps, a fin, offroad tires, and a cheap stereo from Value City that will be stolen soon because the window will not roll up.
What do you mean that's your G Ride? That's just a hooptie.