A fork of Rural Dictionary
When hand to anal penetration becomes 2 hands in a vertical position, while opening into a 'V' shape, disclosing the view of the cavity
Sally wanted the fist so much, I decided to give her a San Quinton Can Opener for the camera view of her Scooby Snacks
When you propel yourself from a high five, plummeting 24 feet and planting your dick firmly in a thimble of ghost pepper infused tobacco sauce, all while executing a perfect split.
In the 1984 olympics Greg Louganis performed the spicy can opener it was rumored that his dick became so hot that; global warming.
(V) A sex move to where someone inserts a large dildo into another person’s asshole and violently shakes it around in all directions until the diameter of the asshole grows by 4 inches or more.
Jimmy: “Why is Jenny walking so funny?”
Johnny: “I showed her The Can Opener last night. Bitch will never walk right again.”
1. that bastard piece of shit occasionally electrical appliance that opens cans or doesn't open cans
Number 2. the only Christmas gift mom gave to your ex
3.the Christmas gift your ex still should not have gotten
4. the only bullshit appliance that you can throw away three times and dig it out of the trash when you need it most and the bastard work
5. the one electrical appliancethat you are glad you did not throw it At your ex because the f**Ucker*** sometimes works
"throw that fucking can opener away!"
"I wish I had thrown that fucking can opener at you! but I'm glad I didn't because I needed to open some peaS and cream of children soup!"
"I've lost the handheld can opener please go dig the fucking can opener out of the garbage...so I can try it again. do you believe after one week of using a handheld can opener the electric fucking can opener workEd"
"go to hell you fucking can opener I am throwing you away now!"
"mom don't buy that asshole a fucking can opener for Christmas he's an idiot and may try to use it; he's ugly buy him a paper bag instead."
"that f****** can opener is possessed!"
when someone asks you a question and you turn your head slowly and mechanically while still looking at your computer screen, book, etc to let them know you acknowledge the question
girl: hey, what do you think of this top?
boy: *does the can opener turn*
girl: hey, i'm talkin to you, dont u can opener turn me, see this is the problem in our relationship....
boy: i heard you, i heard you
When one gives a hand job with one's non-dominant hand.
I had the aisle seat across from a nun so I tried to be discreet while giving him a left-handed can opener.
when you're being pegged in the ass by a vibrating monster dildo while trying to take a shit, but you can't shit because your ass is covered by a dildo. this causes you to vomit up all the shit, and proceed to put it in a jar and freeze it for the next day. used the next morning as a stimulant for sexual arousal and prowess.
person 1: "hey babe, you wanna try the Mississippi Can Opener tonight"
person 2: "sure, just make sure you eat up before"