A fork of Rural Dictionary
GUUGH! UGH! WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU!? WHY WOULD YOU MAKE THIS!? WHY WOULD YOU DRINK THIS!? WHY AREN'T THEY OUT OF BUSINESS!? IT'S LIKE CARBONATED PRUNE JUICE-DIARRHEA! AACK!!
Iam "Here try this." Hym "Oh, you're awake. Why? What is it?" Iam "Kombucha." Hym "Alright.... AACK! WHAT IS THIS? DID YOU POISON ME!?" Iam "Hehehe right? It tastes ALMOST good." Hym *cough* *cough* "Ugh! It's like drinking ginger ale out of a dead fish! 🤢" Iam "Yeah.... I don't think I'll ever buy this again..."
Contrary to popular belief, Kombucha DOES NOT refer to a variety of oolong tea. It is, in fact, an archaic term referring to the externally visible portions of a female's genitals. The term was popularly used in the Victorian era by Ladies in London's High Society to refer to their ungroomed, if not exceedingly hairy, 'nether regions'.
"Ohh, Mr. Darcy! Will you do me the honor of sniffing my Kombucha?" Implored Elizabeth, once Jane had left them alone together for a moment in the Conservatory. Darcy knelt, took in a deep whiff and then after a long pause, punctuated only by the delightful song of a caged canary, replied, "Hmmm! It's sweeter than I expected, almost fruity!"
A health promoting beverage aging back to ancient Chinese medicine that is currently very popular (especially in hippyville) a 'secret formula' for those 'in the know' which is usually made by fermenting black tea and white sugar using a special kombucha colony. It works with your body to boost one's natural, inbuilt ability to fight sickness and disease as well as bring a healthy balance back to metabolism and organs.
It tastes similar to tart apple cider with vinegar.
A pro-biotic drink that you can make at home and it looks just like those pancake creatures on star trek - the ones only trekkies know about. Mr Spock's a big fan. Your first drought will scare the shit out of you. Its a SCOBY!
kombuca tea kombucha mushroom kombucha kvass