Country Dictionary

A fork of Rural Dictionary

Tosser

Noun, British slang; slightly offensive term: dick head, jerk, idiot, bit slow and rough, a non-violent bully, loud and rude + not brightest bulb on the tree. Verb, Toss off, British slang for male masturbation; not the same meaning as the noun "Tosser."

When the cop got to my car and asked for my ID, he realized he'd pulled over the wrong car; what a tosser!

by Gillis1000 January 04, 2009

Tosser

Useless, pathetic, incapable of doing anything right

Tony Blair is a useless tosser

by Anonymous July 30, 2003

Tosser

A chiefly British derogatory term, literally meaning "one who masturbates," but properly used to describe anyone who is either incompetent, supercilious, or otherwise generally unpleasant. Tosser is a British synonym to the primarily American derogatory term, jerkoff, which is also used in the same manner as wanker and tosser.

Joe Sixpack: I'm going to need you to come in for work on Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, and New Year's, all without overtime pay. Jolly Roger: Don't be such a tosser. I'm going to the pub with my mates on those days!

by FoxWing Mabon-Tail December 15, 2008

Tosser

A word used to describe somebody who is completely, utterly useless/stupid/idiotic/etc...

Lucas Leiva is a tosser.

by red_man May 29, 2014

Tosser

A polite way of calling somone a cunt, best used in mixed company or in front of your mother to avoid a clip around the ear hole.

Said Bob to Fred "You're a tosser". Bob really thnks Fred is a cunt, but his mother was in the room.

by Dick Splash September 13, 2003

Tosser

A word often used to describe someone who likes to masturbate more often than is considered normal or a word that is often used to describe someone who is being, quite simply, a prick.

Neil: Ah, Fred. I see thy has a couple o' packs o' fags on tha' lap. Fred: Aye? Neil: Lend us one, cock. Fred: Not today, cock. Thy'll have to get thy own. Neil: Tha's nowt but a tosser. OR Neil: How many times has thy tossed off today, Fred? Fred: Twenty, twenty-one. Why, cock? Neil: 'Cause tha's nowt but a tosser.

by Kenny Cartter July 11, 2008

Tosser

The exact same as a wanker. A person left all alone in the house no mum or dad he goes up into his room and decides to toss him self off he imagines a chocha in his mind.

People who wank/toss them selfs think of chocha cause he is gay. He also wanks about himself cause he is a fanny!!and a total tosser

by Ash1402 June 26, 2006