A fork of Rural Dictionary
British slang for an idiot or fool
Get away from me you bloody wanker!
UK/Aus/NZ slang for:
1. Someone excessively and annoyingly pretentious and/or false, with a strong likelihood of working in the creative industries, especially "new media". Very high populations of wankers are to be found in certain areas of London including Shoreditch and Hoxton; see also Shoreditch twat.
2. Someone with a faintly sociopathic lack of regard for other people; see also arsehole.
3. Someone useless, inefficient or time-wasting, especially in a place or work and/or position of responsibility.
4. A general term of abuse.
5. Someone who masturbates.
1. He spent twenty minutes telling me about the studio's new pathways they're developing in innovative synergistic blue-sky-media treatment concepts. In a fake Cockney-geezer accent. What a fucking wanker.
2. That cunt in the sports car just totally cut me up. What a fucking wanker.
3. He's being paid £25/hour and he just sits there playing Freecell whilst the rest of us do all his work for him, because he's the boss's mate. What a fucking wanker.
4. You're a fucking wanker.
5. You're a fucking wanker.
to be so completely inebriated so as to lose all cognitive function
This guy was so wankered in the pub, that he pissed himself
(i) A marketing slogan which, rather than being created with skill or wit, simply implies that the product will will change your life for the better, - even if its just a packet of sweets
(ii) A marketing slogan which is just *too* cheesy
The following wankerisms were found using a google search on "marketing slogans".
Clothes to make you happy! (Nomads)
Creating more moments of pleasure. (Cadbury Trebor Bassett)
For a wonderful life. (Harvey Nichols)
Happiness is playing Bingo. (Super Bingo)
Happy starts inside. (Minute Maid)
Heaven can't wait. (Nestle Heaven)
Heaven needn't cost the earth. (Sandals)
Heavenly chocolate with a heart. (Divine)
Magic shoes for happy feet. (Starchild)
Make your body happy. (Aquafina Alive)
Make your break, a Delight. (Mars Delight)
One pound. One pan. One happy family. (Betty Crocker)
Pleasure. Every single Pringles Mini. (Pringles, Mini Pringles)
Pleasure. Perfected. (Braun Tassimo)
While "to wank" means "to masturbate", the term "wanker" is seldom if ever used in British slang to denote "one who wanks". It is quite wrong to infer from somebody's being a wanker that they in fact wank (and vice versa), but of course, fair to assume they do in any case. Herein lies the genius of the insult: if you call someone a wanker, it's probably true, but only literally.
I suppose it all originates from our repressed Victorian sexualities, from back when everybody thought they were the only ones to suffer the secret shame of being an actual wanker.
Most children these days learn the word "wanker" long before they learn its literal meaning.
You're such a wanker.
Oh gosh! How did you know?
He lost both of his hands in a childhood kiting accident.
What a wanker!