A fork of Rural Dictionary
malk noun Any milk alternative made from a non-dairy source (e.g. soy, rice, oats, spelt, bulgar, hemp, coconut, almond, cashew, hazelnut, macadamia, pistachio, sunflower, etc.). Since the National Milk Producers Federation is trying to convince the Food and Drug Administration to outlaw the labeling of any product as "milk" that does not come from a mammary gland, a new name is needed. And since humans should not be drinking liquid from any mammary gland other than a human's, "malk" is definitely the healthiest and least gross choice after a person is weaned.
Mom: "Do you want whole or chocolate milk on your Frosted Flakes?" Son: "Seriously?! Do I look like a calf or are you just trying to make me diabetic? I'll take hemp malk on my organic, non-GMO, fair trade muesli, thank you very much."
Malk is any "milk" that is not from animal sources. Milk from animal sources like Cow or Goat is REAL milk! Milk from plant sources such as soy or almond is "milk" or fake milk or Malk. Milk is nutritious while Malk is far less nutritious. You can't feed malk to a baby, or they'll die of malnutrition. They need Cow's Milk, Formula, Goat's Milk, or their Mom's breast milk. Cheese from non animal sources is Chez while yogurt from non animal sources is yofurt.
Idiot mangina: Look at me! I'm drinking Almond Milk! Idiot mangina 2: I'm drinking Soy Milk! Normal person: You're drinking Malk, Manginas! Malk! Normal Person 2: Yeah! What a bunch of Manginas!
The state of shock, disbelieve and complete sluttness that a woman feels after being cover in malk (man milk), cum or load in the face.
Look at Maria she looks completely malked. All of her face is cover in malk and she can't stop crying. What a slut.