Country Dictionary

the number one cause of divorce

Betting someone half your shit you'll love them forever.

After pressuring me into marriage, Kendra now tells me that after 4 years she no longer loves me. So she gets to keep my house, my car, and my boat. I have to totally foot the bill to raise our children, and if I behave she'll let me see them every other weekend.

long term prostitution

Instead of paying full price at the strip club, Jim used marriage to setup a payment plan.

a licence to fuck

conservatives are big on protecting the sacred bond of marriage.

What you should do when you are over 60. This makes sure that you wont get on each others nerves for very long.

Dorothy and Jon had a short marriage he died at 73. She barely got to know him.

A matrimonial state as defined by:

1) Females: "Marriage is the opportunity for two souls to be legally bound together so that they can share their innermost thoughts and feelings while creating the most perfect life together."

2) Males: "Wow, a chick to take care of me like my mother used to - but with the added bonus of sex!"

See marriage definition above.

the beginning of the end.

Oh boy, hes getting married, our thoughts and prayers go out to him.