A fork of Rural Dictionary
Santa is a jolly fat white man, who i never belived in because i knew no white guy would come into my hood after dark.
Hey theres santa, catch his fat white ass.
The biggest dissapoint in a kid's life
That fuckin' Santa wrote me back a letter...he said there was too much fog and he missed my house..again
Thousands of years ago, before the dawn of man as we knew him, there was Sir Santa of Claus, an ape-like creature making crude and pointless toys out of mammoth bones and his own waste. Hurling them at chimp like creatures with crinkled hands, regardless of how they behaved the previous year. These so called toys were buried as witches and defecated upon and hurled at predators that were awoken by the searing grunts of their children. It wasn't a holly-jolly Christmas that year, for many were killed...
A warlike race of elves from the tenth planet landed on the ice-encased Earth and were immeadiatly enslaved by the unevolved Santa-ape to make his toys using galatic elven technology. For ever more fancier models, toys were made into recognizable shapes and given names like "train." But these toys were also thrown at predators and defecated upon because they were so stupid, Christmas still sucked in a big way.
SATAN spelled wrong due to a mix up at the factory.
Oh shit! It says Santa not Satan...well, it sounds pretty good, and if we cover him up in some big red fur coat nobody will notice!