A fork of Rural Dictionary
A phrase of utter and complete shock and surprise in the most extreme sense.
Bro: Hey, Donald Trump won the election! Other bro: Well, fuck me up the ass and call me stupid.
To take unfair advantage, such as in business negotiations, while seizing the moral high ground.
Bob: I can purchase the equipment you’re selling at a lower price AND from an environmentally conscious supplier. Ted: Oh for Christ’s sake, don’t fuck me up the ass like a Catholic priest!
A phrase that may be exclaimed in situations concerning stupid actions/accidents carried out by yourself. It can be used to signify individuals near you that your poor motor skills coupled with hand-eye coordination are just as affective as bringing a pack of bubblegum instead of a grenade to war.
After taking the tray of Tater-Tots out of the oven, you remove the oven mittens. While trying to grab one with your bare hands, you burn your wrist/arm/upper limb on the metal try. * "Ouch! Fuck Me up the Goat Ass!"
To take unfair advantage of someone, such as in business negotiations, while seizing the moral high ground.
Bob: We can purchase the equipment at a lower price AND from an environmentally conscious supplier. Ted: Oh for Christ’s sake, don’t try to fuck me up the ass like a Catholic priest!
An exclamation of extreme shock and disbelief, whether at an event or a sight being witnessed. Can also be used when you discover someone has been fucking you over.
Person 1: Holy shit! What the hell is that person doing? Person 2: Well, fuck me figuratively up the ass, they're raping a dog. Person 1: You have a date with Sally? You know, she has a boyfriend. Person 2: Fuck me figuratively up the ass! Three months and she never said anything!
when you unleash your rage on a dickhead because they cant stop singing
shut the fuck up you bitch ass mother fucker
When someone bamboozles you, being bamboozled When someone makes a fool out of you
Declan: I told you Dave, she sent nudes to five other guys. You owe me five bucks! Dave: Well Fuck me up the ass and call me your bitch! Dave: *Hands over a crisp 5 dollar bill